Beyond the scope of sexual past, one must consider who a person is in their present. We serve a God of grace and mercy, a God who uproots us from our old selfish life and plants us into the soil of holiness and righteousness. For those who are in a true relationship with Jesus, sexual past can no longer be the defining point of their lives.
There are many reasons why people really aren’t ready to commit to covenant. Perhaps you are immature, or started late in the game of growing in personal responsibility?In this situation, the best thing you can do is to ready yourself: discover who you are in God, learn responsibility, get a mentor, and find someone who can help you prepare for the responsibility and joy of marriage.
My past involves drugs, promescuity, sneaking out at night, shoplifiting, and a myriad of other dumb decisions I made, mostly in my teens. So when the “have you ever” questions pop up, they’ve learned Mom almost always says yes and Dad almost always says no (the dude has never even had a cavity, come on!).
This is content that’s easily accessible. On any mainstream porn site, it wouldn’t take long to stumble upon any number of racist titles that promote offensive and unwarranted ethnic and racial stereotypes. In a report titled Racism in Pornography, Alice Mayall and Diana E. H. Russell provide examples of blatantly racist titles including, “Animal Sex Among Black Women,” “Geisha’s Girls,” “Gang Banged by Blacks,” and the list goes on.
The reality is, at some point in our marriage we may find ourselves "noticing someone other than our spouse". First, let me say... there is NO SHAME. Just because you noticed an attractive human being does not make you unfaithful or "unhappily married". God created some seriously beautiful people in this world and I am impressed with His artistry.
Let’s start talking about it. A lot. The world is talking about LGBTQ everywhere we look--so why aren’t we? Let’s talk about God’s design for family with our kids. Let’s talk about His heart for those within the LGBTQ community when our kids are young--before they ever meet a gay-identified person.
On behalf of women everywhere, kind, Godly men, the church, and even God the Father Himself—I want to tell you how desperately sorry I am for what you have endured. The pain you should have never felt. The tears you should have never cried. The life you should have never lived.
The bottom line is, if you don’t have the discussion with them, their school will, their peers will and culture will. They start forming their belief system at a very young age, so be sure to beat them all to it! I determined to be the FIRST VOICE that speaks into the issues of gender identity, sex, God’s design for marriage, pornography and more with my kids.
We should not conflate a condition with an identity. California’s 2019 Assembly Bill 201 makes precisely that type of error in section 2295(a)(2): “Intersex people are a part of the fabric of our state’s diversity to be celebrated, rather than an aberration to be corrected.” That is both a straw argument and misdirection because a medical condition is something one has, not who one is. Celebrate the person, yes, and recognize that person’s disorder of sex development, which may or may not need correcting.
Trauma is something that most of us have experienced in one way or another, whether it was through abuse, abandonment, or a circumstance that we had no control over. As children, when we do not have access to resources that help us navigate through the pain of these experiences, we will often develop coping mechanisms that can be unhealthy in the long term.
Yep, you read that right. We are doing a podcast this month on bedroom talk for married couples! We partnered up with Adam and Karissa King, licensed marriage and family therapists, to do a podcast with the Zicks on what it looks like to pursue intimacy and connection in the marriage bed. Grab a cup of coffee, your spouse, and tune into this month’s podcast!
Take 2 of the MR Podcast with Adam and Karissa King! We are excited to share more of our two part series for married couples with you, and we think that you'll love it as much as we do. Adam and Karissa even offer practical guidance counseling to Cole and Caitlin Zick in this episode, offering an example of what professional marital counseling often looks like.