Finding someone to whom you are physically attracted is an important part of the equation of a healthy relationship. But it’s not the only part of the equation of attraction. It’s important for us to understand that attraction is multi-faceted. While attraction may start as physical, it’s fueled by other aspects of connection: emotional, mental, and spiritual.
We must first start with the core value that sex is about connection, intimacy, and love. Sex is designed to be a safe place where both people are present and vulnerably giving themselves to each other. If sex is a beautiful part of connection with your spouse and not just about orgasming, even when your body, hormonally, may not want sex, your heart and emotions can still desire it.
The loss of self has nothing to do with losing our identity or our personality. It doesn’t mean we ignore our needs, wants, and desires or let go of our goals and dreams. It doesn’t mean we forget our opinions, our beliefs, and our ideas. No, letting go of self means one thing and one thing alone: we choose to lose all that is wrong in exchange for all that is right. Losing our “selves” means we let go of all that God has called us not to be in exchange for all he has called us to be.
It can be hard if you’ve been single for a long time to, as you say, keep hope alive. The two keys we’ll focus on in this Q&A are to have faith and live a full life. In this section we’ll start with the topic of faith, as our belief systems are what shape our experiences of life.
What once had been a marriage of mutual passion had dwindled to a cohabiting couple, sharing daily chores, bills, church services, but sadly void of any warmth behind closed doors. This, sadly, is not an isolated case. It's shocking how many woman (or men) have decided sex is only for the newly married, is unimportant, or simply have no desire to be intimate with you their spouse. What's also harrowing to intimacy is how easy it is to put sex on the back burner when the kids start arriving!
The other day I was telling my coworker stories from the early days of my marriage. It was one of those moments that made me realize, Wow—we really did not know the tools for building a successful marriage back then . . . but thank goodness we found them, because where we are now looks nothing like those days! The first and most important question we learned to ask ourselves was this: “Who is my counselor right now—love or fear?” Listening to fear led me to see Ben as an opponent, not a partner.
Years of counseling experience have taught me that marriage plans can either be good or bad, depending on the couple’s reasons for getting married. My initial conversations with engaged couples are full of questions designed to help me understand why they have decided to say “I do.” Here are some examples of good reasons and not-so-good reasons for getting married…
People love giving unsolicited marriage advice. Especially when they interact with newlyweds. But the problem is, so much of it is really terrible. Horrible. Bad advice. So bad, that if my husband and I would have actually applied it to our lives, I’m certain we wouldn’t be standing here today. Here are 5 bits of really bad marriage advice…
Sexual addiction is very complex. There are several underlying issues that contribute to this problem. There are also unique issues that a spouse faces when sexual addiction is suspected and/or revealed. As a spouse of a sex addict, it is imperative that you understand your role in the recovery process. Here are 7 helpful things every spouse should know about sex addiction.
Pornography is a serial killer! It violates your soul, destroys your relationships, and derails your future. Many people who are stuck in porn (and other secret sin) don’t realize the painful effect that it has on their family and children. In 1 Corinthians 7:14, the Bible says that one believing parent sanctifies the home. This truth can work the other way around and a parent can open the door to demonic activity for their whole family.
Great dating ideas don't always turn out to be the best in real life. Although we'd all like our dates to be straight out of the movies, real life sometimes makes them awkward and more like comedies. In an attempt to help you feel better about your life and ease some of the pressure of going on perfect dates - our team wanted to share with you some of our "best" experiences in dating. Enjoy!
I’m well aware that counseling — specifically marriage counseling — often gets seen as a last resort. We think about marriage counseling when there are major issues like abuse, addictions, abandonment, or infidelity. But what if I told you we needed to start considering counseling 10 steps before those things ever happen?