For many partners, finding out their significant other has secretly watched porn can feel just they discovered they’ve been cheated on. For some other partners, they may feel upset but not betrayed. And still, for others, they may not be bothered at all by their partner’s porn habit.
“For me, Playboy was my gateway into full on pornography addiction. My dad had a Playboy left out at age five and it’s affected almost every choice I made for the rest of my life…. From age five till now, having to kick the habit and it just presents itself in the open like it’s okay and I stand up and say, ‘No, it’s not ok.’” 1
Porn, and sexuality in general, can be very sensitive and personal topics. Consider how people tend to get pretty defensive and have the most emotional response to personal topics. Bringing porn up in terms of how you are involved with the movement in your life could be a softer opening to the topic. Talk like you’re telling your own story, and they’ll ideally respond with theirs.
Pornhub crosses all lines and boundaries in their thirst for traffic and money. Even in the wake of the #metoo movement, which has brought mass awareness and justice around sexual misconduct, Pornhub has somehow gotten a pass. Yet, they have failed on all humane levels to qualify as a legitimate business and must be shut down. Until they are, we will see more victims, more child sex abuse material, and more money fueling an enterprise bent on protecting and profiting off of sex crimes.
Early exposures to pornography can leave a lasting impression on young girls. Viewing pornography that depicts acts of violence, rape or other degrading acts towards women has repercussions on an impressionable teenage mind.
When I look at the body of Christ at large, we are eerily silent on so many things that are wreaking havoc in people’s lives—things like greed, same-sex attraction, hypocrisy, gossip, self-identification, slander, moral relativism, gender confusion, abortion, pornography, and more. Is this what truly loving people equates to—silence?
This is content that’s easily accessible. On any mainstream porn site, it wouldn’t take long to stumble upon any number of racist titles that promote offensive and unwarranted ethnic and racial stereotypes. In a report titled Racism in Pornography, Alice Mayall and Diana E. H. Russell provide examples of blatantly racist titles including, “Animal Sex Among Black Women,” “Geisha’s Girls,” “Gang Banged by Blacks,” and the list goes on.
At its core, MindGeek is a porn company. Let me rephrase, MindGeek is THE porn company. They are the controlling entity behind the biggest and highest trafficked porn sites today. Pornhub, RedTube, YouPorn, PornMD, PornIQ, GayTube, Tube8, XTube, Brazzers, Reality Kings, are just A FEW of the long list of sites MindGeek controls.
Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 8:00 pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00 pm. It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 6:30 am. If you would not make a call to someone’s landline, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.
Your body is DESIRING something and it’s making it clear. These desires are real and ARE from God, so the prayer should not be, “God, take these desires away!” It should be something along the lines of, “God, help me have self control and stewardship over my own body!” So don’t think that because you have these desires and temptations it’s sinful. It’s sinful when you choose to say yes to your flesh instead of righteousness.
The aftermath of the cruelty I survived on those porn shoots has been a fear of people that I am only now overcoming. Every crime was recorded and lived on as masturbatory fuel for men. For a long time just walking down the street was hard because I never knew who had seen them. So I never looked up. I have learned to look people in the eye again, but it took years and distance from that time.
If you don’t think porn is a healthy habit (and research would back you up, there), you may have to have some hard conversations about this potentially awkward topic. And not only that, but it can be difficult to know what to say when you’re talking to someone about something as personal as recovery from a porn habit—especially when you care about that person and are being hurt by their porn consumption. You want to be able to encourage them into getting better rather than shame them back into their hidden habits.