SOUL TIES
Sex is a tridimensional experience: spirit, soul, and body. Anytime you have sex with a person you bond with them. Dr. Daniel Amen writes in his book, “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life,” “Whenever a person is sexually involved with another person, neurochemical changes occur in both their brains that encourage limbic, emotional bonding. Limbic bonding is the reason casual sex doesn’t really work for most people on a whole mind and body level. Two people may decide to have sex ‘just for the fun of it,’ yet something is occurring on another level that they might not have decided on at all: sex is enhancing an emotional bond between them whether they want it or not. One person, often the woman, is bound to form an attachment and will be hurt when a casual affair ends. One reason it is usually the woman who is hurt most is that the female limbic system is larger than the male’s.”
This is what we call soul ties. Sex is like gluing two pieces of wood together and the next day ripping them apart. Of course, wood from the opposite board remains on each board. A piece of your sex partner (the good, bad, and ugly) stays with you (and vice versa) for the rest of your life. You can only imagine what it looks like when you bond with multiple partners.
Unhealthy soul ties are often the ramifications of having partners that you create a life-long bond with through a sexual encounter(s), but with whom you only have a short-term relationship with. The bond (soul tie) remains long after the relationship is over, leaving both sexual partners longing for wholeness.
THREE REASONS UNHEALTHY SOUL TIES TAKE PLACE:
1. People are misinformed and therefore convinced that sex is strictly a single-dimensional, physical act with no emotional or spiritual connections. Yet after sex they find themselves mysteriously longing for the person they may not even like.
2. A person (usually the woman) gives him or herself sexually to someone expecting that the intensely intimate act of intercourse would create a bond that would lead to deeper levels of commitment in their relationship. But soon she discovers that her sexual partner was taking advantage of her need for intimacy and used her vulnerability to get laid. Of course, this leads to a person being emotionally and spiritually bonded to somebody that they deeply resent!
3. Two people commit to marriage and therefore surmise that the covenant vows are only a formality. So they live together and enjoy a sexual relationship outside of a life-long commitment. But later they decide (for whatever reason) that they don’t want to live in a covenant relationship and eventually break up. They usually don’t realize how deeply they have wounded each other as their souls are ripped apart, tearing the very fabric of their being in the separation.
I understand that there are hundreds of other reasons why unhealthy soul ties take place, but I am simply trying to give you a few examples.
7 SIGNS THAT YOU HAVE AN UNHEALTHY SOUL TIE:
1. You are in a physically, and/or emotionally, and/or spiritually abusive relationship, but you “feel” so attached to them that you refuse to cut off the connection and set boundaries with them.
2. You have left a relationship (maybe long ago), but you think about the other person obsessively (you can’t get them out of your mind).
3. Whenever you do anything – make a decision, have a conversation with someone etc., you “feel” like this person is with you or watching you.
4. When you have sex with someone else (hopefully your husband or wife), you can hardly keep yourself from visualizing the person you have a soul tie with.
5. You take on the negative traits of the person that your soul is tied to and carry their offenses whether or not you actually agree with them.
6. You defend your right to stay in a relationship with the person that your soul is tied to, even though it is negatively effecting or even destroying the important relationships in your life (husband, wife, kids, leaders, etc.)
7. You have simultaneous experiences and/or “moods” as the person your soul is tied to. This can even include sickness, accidents, addictions etc.
1 Corinthians 6:15 – Do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, “THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.”
THERE IS HOPE
There is hope if you find yourself in an unhealthy soul tie. You can never fall so far that you can’t be restored. New life is available to you by simply repenting and asking Jesus to forgive you. Forgiveness restores the standard in our lives, and you can live in freedom and hope again.
Originally published on krisvallotton.com.
Awesome, clear and concise! Truly a clear illumination of what can happen.
This is so good!You can’t deny it, especially if you have been through break ups.
You are absolutely beautiful Olya!!
thanks for the teaching
Thank you. I needed this.
I hope you find a fellowship that you can get involved in)to seek for assistance to have you to cope with this situation. You only can allow God to make you better. In life we do not understand everything. But God promises us that “all things work together for the good that loves Him.” Be encouraged and keep your peace, faith, and love for yourself and others. Sometimes we do not understand, but it is better to forgive her and for you to keep your peace then holding on to the thought of being married. If she left then allow her to, maybe you will have a chance to ask her why she left. But until then, do your best to keep you healthy and the other relationships in your life healthy.
One thing kinda throws me here….. The Bible says two become one flesh, nothing there about souls. I know what this experience feels like but where does the Bible talk about soul ties?
Hey Michael,You are a triune being made up of a body, soul, and spirit (1 Thessalonians 5:23), and your actions affect all three parts of who you are. You can’t do anything with the body (or flesh) that doesn’t affect the soul and spirit as well. When you have sex, it not only connects your bodies together, but it connects your souls and spirits as well. Hope this helps!
My friend told me that her and her husband are in a open marriage. They call themselves free spirit. How does this affect their marriage? Especially if soul ties are real.
God gives us a specific design for sex and tells us to keep it between a husband and a wife. Whenever we go outside of this design, it brings hurt in our marriage, which is why He asks us not to do it. Sex bonds you together and the more you have sex with people besides your spouse, the less you will be able to bond with your spouse.
The Bible does indeed talk about the soul tie! One instance in particular is in the story of David & Jonathan:
“And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” 1 Sam 18:1.
It CAN happen and indeed does!
Paul explicitly tells us that our battles are not “flesh & blood”, but spiritual!
” For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Eph. 6:12.
Sin keeps us in bondage! When someone is bound they are tied up!
So does an emotional connection count in effect as. Physical connection between the two. There might be relations where it was not physical but just emotional. How does it effect here.is it equally sinful! How do we treat this condition of heart
In the bible it mentions 1 samuel 18:1 (kjv)…..that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Another verse in Genesis 34:2-3 (kjv)… and his soul clave unto Dinah…. her loved her….” so yeah the bible mentions soul ties and attachments to people.
I’ve been divorced from my wife for two years now an I can’t seem to move on with the person I’m now dating. It’s like I can’t let go. She just walked out on our marriage. She’s done this to two different marriages previous too ours. I feel so jaded an so still attached and she’s moved on without remorse an said Christ has opened another door for her to walk through. I just don’t get it. Please someone reply an help me !
Hello Chris,Remember, you can’t make someone love you! She has moved on with her life, therefore you must ask God what to do with yours. You are currently in a relationship, but are unable to give her the one thing she deserves (YOU)! If you are still drawn to your wife; it is time that you be alone for a while, and wait for God to give you some peace, and direction. So many times we fill hurt with other things that God does not intend for us, and when we make a bigger mess of things we wonder if God has forgotten us. You should give yourself some time before jumping into another relationship. If you have not gone through deliverance; I would strongly advise you do so before entering into another relationship. Always remember Jesus loves you!
Here’s what I did, after much suffering,anguish and the like,(on more than one occasion)I attended a healing/deliverance ministry in my city , two men prayed over me, a couple demons
were cast out relatively easily,never masturbated, or used porn again.
I delivered myself once or twice in Jesus name from evil soul ties, I was set free!
No joke, look up self deliverance.
I really needed to hear this! Ungodly soul ties are not healthy and it makes you feel empty.
This really answered questions I’ve had concerning a soul tie in my life that must be broken, over 10 years We’ve longed for each other.. but married to someone else (long story) it’s torture and I know God is not pleased and will deliver and it’s wearing me down..but God is able!
I have been broken up with my high school ex for about 4 years now (lost virginities to each other), and am happily married to a very godly man for 2 years. I have gotten so much prayer and sozo-type things for my past relationship with my ex, but am still feeling very “haunted” for lack of better terms by him. You described it very well in your article, Kris! I am exhausted by it. I could be seriously wrong, but can’t seem to find anything left that needs to repented of, or prayed through, or items to be given away, or things to declare. Its been 4 years! Where I am at this point is wondering (both my husband and I are wondering) if I need to just face any fears and ask my ex to a casual coffee or lunch (with my husband present at the beginning and in the area) so that I can NORMALIZE his existence. I’m getting mixed up in all these head games. What would your take on this be?
This has opened my eyes to Soul Ties. I have been ministering to my daughter and other young woman about this. I experienced this and was delivered because I rebuked, repented and reclaimed my body and soul through Jesus. Jesus can and will deliver you from anything and everything!????
I’m so stuck in this soul tie. It’s so bad that a big part of me wants to get rid of it, and I know the steps, but I can’t get myself to take them. I can’t help but wonder if this tie is so strong for some other reason. But truth is I don’t want to be with him, I just don’t want to lose him AND FOR NO GOOD REASON. He isn’t good for me, I’m taking on some of his negative attributes (just like you said) and I can feel his pain and frustration throughout every day. What is wrong with me?!?! How do I “want” to break this tie?
I’m going through the exact same thing. I know I need to be free of him, but I long for him even though I know he is no good for me. I have repented and asked for forgiveness but it seems like it is not working. I know this bond needs to be broken. How can I break it?
I am in tears reading this. I just got out of a long relationship with someone and it was not healthy. I spoke with a friend about the pain that I have been feeling. She asked if I had sex with him, I told her yes. She said…this explains everything. What I know now is that a man does not deserve my soul or my heart unless he has gone through God to get it! I am now healing from the the loss, and the pain of this relationship while he has moved on with someone else. Reading this really has given me conformation that I am doing the right thing. I do not want to be sexually active with another man until I am married. The pain is just not worth it. I am still hurting. But, each day it gets better. And I get even more close to God. Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. Psalm 62:1
Dear, may be it is hard for you. But remember your covenant with your husband near God. Read word of God and pray and love your husband with all your heart and never return to that ex. God will help, just depend upon God. All soul tie will be break. Pray and read together with your husband and grow in fellowship and seek Lord. May God bless you! Try to never think or return to ex.
Pray at midnight, with authority. Look up soul ties breaking prayer and pray them at midnight.
Lord….how do I break a soul tie with someone I have children with? (We’ve never dated..just 9 years of friendship then this person changed for the worst) became degrading, hurtful mentally and Emotionally, his presence alone drains my soul..but every now n then we still are intimate….I NEED this attachment severed at all costs….. For my sanity…. For my life!
What are the steps of breaking the6 soul ties?
God bless you Kris. I’ve had multiple relationships that has really severed my soul. I get depressed a lot of times and every time I feel I have no strength or passion to do anything. It’s like my soul has been taken from me.What do I do to overcome these battles?
God has Grace over everything, Jesus Christ is the way…..He is the answer above all….Keep connected with the word all things will be restored in His name
This is so on point!!!!!! I must share!!!
I have more of a question. Is there any way to have a soul tie to a good friend?
Hey Brianna,Yes, it’s possible to have a soul tie to a good friend. It can be healthy. Sometimes there are people you just connect with deeply, a biblical example would be David and Jonathan. It crosses the line into an unhealthy soul tie when your relationship becomes codependent. Hope that helps!
Better to not grow in a relationship like a man and woman or boy and girl. Always attraction and attachment and temptation there.
I ran across the term soul ties from a social media post so I Googled and found this article. I now know exactly what’s been wrong with me for years. I’ve allowed men to use me because I was so desperate for love tieing myself to them. The guy I’m currently seeing I’ve known for 8 months and we finally slept together 2 weeks ago. Since that’s happened I’ve been acting like a crazy person. Obsessing over calls and texts that go unanswered or no response to. Making up stories trying to get his attention. When before i took things as they came and never stressed over him or over us for that matter. I’ve been driving myself crazy trying to figure out what in the world is happening. This is the answer! I promised myself that I wouldn’t give of myself again until marriage and I did it again. I’ve been a mess and literally feel like crying at the drop of a hat. Now we are on the outs because my temper got the best of me. What do I do now…
Hey Latonia,We’re sorry to hear you’ve had a rough couple of weeks, but we’re glad this post could offer some help. It would probably be a good idea to bring some other people you trust, maybe church leaders or people who have a healthy marriage, into your journey to give you more insight. It might be a good idea to take a break from dating for a while until you get some of those things healed that you mentioned. There’s a reason you’re feeling “desperate for love.” That’s a need in you that needs to be met by God and by healthy community around you before it can truly be met in a relationship. If you’re starving for love, then of course you’re going to be driving yourself crazy when you think you might lose someone who’s giving you love. Make sure you go to God with that need and it’s always a good idea to bring others into your journey who can see things you can’t. Hope this helps!
Thanks for sharing. I know quite a bit about Soul Ties so you’ve think I would’ve learned my lesson by now. I got involved too soon, too quick with someone I barely know. Big mistake there. But I found out by his behavior and what he’s told me about his past. He’s recently divorced and separated from his child and just moved out here to California. His behavior shows that he’s emotionally unavailable mostly likely due to his life changing events. We were intimate. Second mistake. He pushes me away and then pulls me back in. He has now pushed me away again by not communicating at all. I’m sharing this to say that I’m feeling the effects of the Soul Ties right now. I have took on his insecurities, hurt, pain, doubts, guarded behavior, confusion, indecisiveness, emotional wall build up and I can go on and on. Everything that he is dealing with internally has transferred to me through sex. I’m guarded now, I’m insecure, I’m confused, I’m indecisive, I’m hurt and not willing to give anyone else a chance with me relationally. Sounds like him, right? I’ve beat myself for the many mistake’s I’ve made. Thrown myself “pity parties” back to back. I’ve asked God to forgive me for my sins. And now, I have to let go and let God rebuild and repair my heart and spirit. Soul ties are so real. God bless you all!
Dear friends, since you are foreigners and temporary residents [in the world], I’m encouraging you to keep away from the desires of your corrupt nature; Desires of the flesh. These desires constantly attack you. 1 Peter 2:11
Soul ties are real. The bible urges us to abstain from unlawful intimacy which causes a war in our souls. A war between repenting, seeking the Lord and breaking the soul ties or continuing in the sin that reinforces the soul tie.
I have been there and I know it. If you have fallen, rise up, wipe off your dirt and keep on keeping on!! If you give up, the enemy rejoices and uses you until you are destroyed. God loves you and longs you to repent and he will restore you.
Jeremiah 15:17
For you repent, I’ll restore you that you may serve me
I’m in a sexual relationship with a girl, I really like her and she, me but I know we should be married and I feel its opening me up to bad mojo. I need God to change my heart because I don’t want to stop bad enough to tell her I want to stop and wait. Thank you for prayers.
I’ve been married almost 20 years. I had 2 physical affairs a few years ago and multiple on-line relationships. My husband knows everything, said he has forgiven me, and has given me a second chance. The soul ties that occurred with the 2 extramarital relationships have been devastating. I too constantly think about them. My husband and I were extremely close for about 6 months immediately following my disclosure, but things have been pretty rocky over the last year or so. It’s like I’m here, but i’m not 100% here, because i feel like my soul is split into 3 pieces, with my husband receiving only a third of it. So unfair to my husband. For myself, I feel tired and broken constantly. Thank you Kris for the article, and for helping all of us to feel not alone in our brokenness. God Bless you.
In today’s society of casual sex, online dating and easy access, it’s no wonder we have become desensitized to the power of sex. I was married 20 years and stayed in this abusive relationship knowing it was bad for me. I then went on to date someone for 2 years then another for a year. I thought I was “good”. Then the last man I dated was the end of the rope for me. We “dated” for mere weeks and when he ghosted on me, I was absolutely devastated.
Since then I have tried to date but could not get this man off my mind. I cried constantly, reached out to him on occasion (he did reply back at some point casually) and have yet to move on. I long for him like I have no other man. I knew something was amiss.
I just heard of soul ties at a revival church last night and we prayed for severance as I was told he placed an ungodly tie on me and this explained everything. I am praying this was undone and my life can continue…..
this is really amaizing,wish more people could know the dangers of ungodly soul ties
I permanently sever, remove and not to remain any and all soul ties and any and all chords.
This has helped me. The one about David and Jonathan. Reason being . I had a man as a friend only, for years. We as a group where I worked went out to eat often over the course of four years. Took me that long to start really enjoying the company of one man in particular. he was a devoted christian that always had his head phones on, worshiping and really loved God. That was what really drew me in. His love for the lord. We started getting serious and he asked to marry me. We waited for over a year. Wanted everything to be perfect. Wish I had not waited. We never had sex. He had great respect for me. We only kissed and nothing passionate. My feelings grew very intense and he had a heart attack. He also had to have open heart surgery. During this time my love for him was so intense, I felt like my heart was ripped out. It grew even more as I stayed by his bedside for seven long months before he passed. My feelings grew even more. I have never cried this much over a man. It has been months and I can’t stop crying. Did our spirits join even though we never had sex or married? I feel so lost without him. Very painful memory of what could have been. I would like any response of help. Sometimes I am okay. Sometimes I can’t stop crying. I loved him so much. we were both older. Me 64. Him 70. I felt young again. Thanks for listening.
Donna,I’m so sorry to hear this story. This must have been very difficult for you to experience. It is possible to have a soul tie without sex since this is what David and Jonathan had. It sounds like the two of you had a deep emotional connection. It might be helpful for you to even get some outside help, like a counselor or someone who can walk you through the healing process, because this is a difficult thing to have to experience, and sometimes it’s helpful to have a professional who can guide us through the intense emotions of it. I pray that you would feel the Lord’s comforting presence close to you as you heal. He loves you. Hope this helps!
I’ve had a young lady that’s been in and out of my life for the past 10 yrs. She always brings up things from the past and tries to use them against me. I always try to see the good in people no matter what. So I always seem to give her the benefit of the doubt even though she never gives it to me. I’m really trying to keep my focus on God. When your emotions are involved what would be a good way to completely did yourself of a situation such as mine?
Hey Raymond,It sounds like you may need to put some boundaries in place for this relationship. If she is bringing up things from the past and using them against you, then she is probably not someone who has earned close access to you. It’s always difficult to put boundaries in place when emotions are involved, but it is important to do so. You want to surround yourself with people who speak the same words over you and your life that God does. God does not bring up your past and use it against you, and neither should the people close to you. Here is one of our blogposts that talks a little more about boundaries: https://moralrevolution.com/whats-in-your-yard-2/ . Hope this helps!
I only just recently learned about soul ties and am so relieved, because now I have a name for what I have been struggling with since my new husband and I got engaged and then married this past January. The minute he put a ring on my finger it’s as though he snapped and accused me of turning into the horrible ex-wife he’d been complaining about for the two years we had dated. They have to communicate because of their 3 boys and they divorced because she didn’t want to work things out after her SECOND affair. However, she is a very bitter, controlling narcissist (I am not saying this lightly- I am a therapist by trade) and did not want him to move on with his life. Unfortunately, somehow she still controls him and he is in complete denial about it-seems afraid of her almost. No matter how much I plead with him to set boundaries with her, he just can’t do it, even though she is doing psychological damage to the children and it is now really affecting our marriage. She has really control over the middle child as well as his mother and he won’t stand up to anyone and “become one flesh” with me (other than physically) and stand up for me as his wife. I am doing my best to blend our family- I have two of my own. Our oldest two boys are both 15 and are best buds, and his youngest loves me despite his ex’s best efforts, but I am growing weary. This newfound knowledge of the soul tie at least lets me know I’m not crazy. So much makes sense now.I do have one question–could my husband have a soul tie with his middle child who just turned 14? I swear it’s as though he slipped into a codependent relationship with him as well. He is the golden child and clear favorite of both parents and holds the entire family emotionally hostage most of the time. It’s absurd. Never held accountable and barely punished for LOTS of acting out. Unfortunately he is cute as a button and an exceptional athlete, which doesn’t help his overall cockiness.
Anyway, I do know I am giving this to God now and praying he will open my husband’s eyes to the fact he is destroying our marriage with his inability to set healthy boundaries with his ex-wife and his kids when they need discipline/natural consequences for behavior. Does he have to pray for his own deliverance or can prayers of intercession work?
Hey Mary,There sounds like there are a lot of things going on here that may not all necessarily be soul ties. It’s good that you’re praying for your husband because prayer is powerful and can change hearts, but it sounds like ultimately a lot of this will be up to him to face and go after his own healing. You may want to seek some outside help or counseling to have an objective person who can walk you through some of these deeper issues.
What do you do when you’ve asked for forgiveness but still sense this unhealthy connection?
Forgiveness and breaking soul ties with someone might not be an overnight thing, but something you have to do over and over until you notice a difference. You can always ask the Lord to help you figure out why you might still be feeling an unhealthy connection as well.
This was a very informative and awesome article! I truly enjoyed every comment and gained further clarity of how soul ties are affecting my life.
What a load of tosh. Only we can forgive ourselves and heal ourselves, no one, even Christ can do it for us. Even he said that!
My wife and I married about a year and a half ago. It is a second marriage for both of us. I came straight out of my last marriage into this relationship and into a very short courtship and engagement. We had the most awesome 8 months of courting ever. We both felt we had never loved anyone like we loved each other. After the fantastic and ecstatic honeymoon that assessment quickly changed. I was looking for that bliss to continue for a while. I took it literally when my wife said that she would generally want to make love everyday and that she couldn’t wait to make love in our new bed in our new home. Days went by with no intimacy due to business, an insanely long hair appointment, etc. When went to watch a movie, she sat I the corner and our normal spooning and cuddling was gone. When Inquedtioned it, she got offended and felt like I was making it an obligation to connect. I wasn’t just being organic. We talked about sharing our hearts. I shared that I was struggling with porn again to a small degree and she said that she was thinking of someone that she shouldn’t – her ex boyfriend who came between her ex husband and me. She felt he was a direct assignment from the enemy before and hated that she laid with him. She went to the bathroom and was crying thinking about missing him. She shared that with me as her friend and I suppose to pray. I did pray with her. We had even prayed before about breakin this soul tie before we married. Not long after she had to go to a training where she knew she might run into him. She loathed it. However, when Inadked her about seeing him she didn’t want to talk about it and the secrecy made it worse. I found out that she saw him in meetings about monthly. She said she rarely saw him and no to worry. She had broken off relationship with his mother, etc. We argued about the definition of “rarely”. Meanwhile her ex husband was irritating us and I blew up at him unjustly because Ineas mad about the ex boyfriend. This triggered her thinking that she was too hard on the ex boyfriend because I had done the same thing. At that point, she did a complete 180 and felt she owed him and apology. He was an unbeliever but apparently got saved some time in the past year. In fact he is preaching now (which is another story since he actively pursued my wife from the very first month of marriage). He would continue to arrange things where he could work even closer with her. He would send flowers and even got into an email war with me and told me intimate things about them all to get me out of character and accuse me to my wife. He would come me out looking better all the time. I obsessed over the situation and it nearly destroyed our marriage and gave my wife and ulcer. The trials over the past year have been unheard of. My wife had a surgery and I cared for her like my own body. I’m that time he got closer waiting for her. She never socialized with him or openly sinned but she would defend him even though she would share what he did. It was almost like she expected me not to be angry over him chasing my wife but still say he is a good person. The last thing that happened before she left the job for multiple reasons was that my wife agreed to have lunch with his mother who popped up one day. She was ill and felt sorry for her. I agreed reluctantly. She invited my wife to come hear him preach but was clear that I should not come. After that my wife and I had the biggest fight ever because she felt I was judging him and his mother. I said I would pray for my enemies, but they were both, in fact enemies of our marriage. This all affected how she sees me and once again my spiritual maturity seems less and his seems to be ever growing. She wouldn’t even listen to any scripture about not putting a novice (a new convert) behind the pulpit. Looking back, it just seems unnatural. She had rejected this man’s advances a million times but his influence on our marriage had been uncanny. I was never jealous or insecure about him before we married – even when he showed up with a ring one night.
Is there a soul tie or something else happening here?
Hey Eric,This sounds like there could be several things going on and since we don’t know you personally, it might be a good idea to talk to a church leader or marriage counselor or someone who can give you an objective but godly perspective on all of this. It’s difficult to launch into everything that’s going on without being able to sit down with you, so someone who is able to do so might be a better help.
What an eye opening awaking article! So true about the power of a soul tie! Repentance is the Key!
How correct you are. I have this rule of thumb people don’t ask questions they don’t already know the answer to, and I’ve always dealt myself my own parents but I have learned it’s not my place it is the Lord Jesus Christ himself not me. However I have found he is much more forgiving and easier with his requirements of repentance
Please, permit me to share this. God bless your ministry. How can a lady who has not been in soul tie thing in terms of sex handle a man who has been involved in it before. Though, both are Christians. Hope the soul tie the man had before can resurface in their relationship?
Any past relationships or past hurts can come up in a new relationship if they haven’t been dealt with. It’s his responsibility to heal and cut any soul ties with past relationships so he can start fresh with you. The good news is, if he’s a Christian, then he can go to the Lord and get the freedom and restoration he needs from Him. It might even be a good idea for him to talk through things with a godly man or leader who can help him process everything.
Wow, where do I start. My exwife and I met in 2003. We began having sex within a couple months. A few months after that she was pregnant with out first child. Both of us had multiple sexual partners before and during the time we were dating. We got married on our one year anniversary of dating.
During our marriage my ex cheated on me several times. Five times at least as those are the ones that she was either caught or confessed to. I suspect several others. We had two more children during the time we were married. Now, I want to make it clear that although I didn’t gave sex with anyone else’s while we were married, I know I was a nightmare to live with at times. I was in the military and deployed twice for long periods of time and developed PTSD. It caused anger issues that I could not see and did not confront. I never hit her but I know I emotionally beat the crap out of her at times.
We divorced in June 2016. In January 2017 I found God when I attended church for the first time in years. I realized what a mistake it was to get a divorce. I missed my family. She and I started dating in February and began going to a Christian marriage counselor for several sessions. A couple months later she and the kids moved in with me. VICTORY! Or so I thought. You see, my parents live with me as well. She and my step-mom just could not get along. There was constant fighting and I was caught in the middle of it all. Worse yet, I had bought this house and moved my parents down after the divorce so they gave their house to my brother. My ex decided she couldn’t take it any longer and went and got an apartment around the corner. In October she finally called it quits on us. The thing is, I don’t want to give up on us. I think she is wanting to move on an start dating others (if she hasn’t already) but I can’t fight this feeling that I should be fighting for us. I know our souls are entwined and she is the only person I want to maintain that bond with. Even the idea of me dating others seems disgusting to me. I want my family whole again at whatever the cost.
I agree with every bit of this. I’ve experienced it, more than once. The only problem here is that there was no info on how to BREAK a soul tie.
There is a video by Juanita Bynum called no more sheets! Very good. She speaks on how to break soul ties.
Can “soul ties” occur in platonic relationships/friendships? or is physical intimacy always a factor?
“Soul ties” can occur in platonic relationships. A healthy soul tie of friendship was created between Jonathan and David in the Bible. Physical intimacy does not necessarily have to be a factor.
Yes they can. This is why it’s best for you to ask the Lord to bring the right friends into your life. You don’t want to develop any kind of ties w the wrong people…
Very useful information. I have seen for myself how a wife after betraying her marriage by cheating on her husband assumes a soul tie with the man outside. The soul-tie on the outside removes the ability of the female to finction in her own marriage even after being caught. While the extramarital relationship was going on, the wife found it impossible to treat her husband as a husband, as she removed the respect, sex and domestic services from her husband. The extra-matital soul-tie bring into focus Matthew 6:24. ‘you cannot serve 2 masters, you will love one and hate the other’. In all this, God is able to forgive and restore, but the guilty offending spouse must ask!
I greatly acknowledge your advice and help. Praise God. Amen!
Remember that David and Jonathan had a soul tie with each other. I would call this a very healthy relationship.
Thanks you for this and hope you have a GREAT LIFE AND DAYYY!!!!!!!!!
Plus Haooy a Thanksgiving
Very enlightening. I needed to read this. Thank you.
I have messed up a whole lot!
Wish I had learned this much earlier.
Thanks for the post.
thank you so much for writing this, because its amazing to know that there is still hope.
A soul tie doesn’t have to have been created through sex or through physical contact, it could, simply, have been formed or created through strong emotions or emotional attachment, well, at least, that’s what I’m learning.
After the person repents and commits his/her life to Christ, they must intentionally, outloud, break the soul tie and command the soul-parts that are still in each other to go back to the other person in Jesus’ name. Curses and demons that came in with the other person’s soul fragment must also be broken and cast out. This process is best done in the presence of someone that knows about inner healing and deliverance.
I’ve been trying so hard to overcome this thing. My only hope now is Jesus Christ
Awesomeness.
I’m really glad that I have seen this cause I really need it
I’d love to see a blog expand on #7! I’ve not really heard a ton on how we get affected in that way but I’d love to learn!
The Bible doesn’t say your soul is tied at all , it says your bodies become as one….repent of your sin and sin no more. This is a classic case of reading something and having the wrong interpretation, if your soul was bonded forever to that person , it would say so in the Bible
Your soul is bonded to your flesh. The chemicals released during sex cause confusion. The Bible also says a man and woman shall become one.
You can break soul ties. The Bible SAYS don’t have sex outside marriage. It’s great you don’t have that big of a connection but others do. To judge everyone by your reactions is also wrong.
https://www.greatbiblestudy.com/deliverance-ministry/basic-introduction-to-soul-ties/
My wife and I are dealing with spiritual/physical trouble this morning. This other site may help you as well.
The simplest way to describe them would be a person’s soul that is connected with someone on a spiritual level. 1 Samuel 18:1 gives a glimpse of the depth of David and Jonathan’s close friendship. In Mark 10:6-9, we see that God intended sex to bind a husband and wife together in marriage. To become one, this vow was meant to last forever.