A Man With a Plan

Sal, 29, California



Before I knew my wife, I had a couple of serious relationships. Since I was a child, I knew I would not give away my virginity to anyone except my wife, so that part of purity was never in question for me. Unfortunately, there were other things I did because I didn’t really have a plan. I thought, “Well, I just won’t have sex,” but just having that boundary ended up not being enough. With those relationships I did things physically and emotionally that I’m not proud of, and gave a part of myself away that I will never get back.

“I learned that no matter how strong I thought I was, I still needed a plan.”

By the time I met my wife, I had learned that no matter how “strong” I thought I was, I still needed to have a plan for how I was going to be responsible with myself. Early in our relationship we made some clear boundaries to protect each other. The most important, and most helpful, boundary was that we would not kiss on the lips until we got married. Making this decision was not just out of our pure will — we prayed and both felt the Lord give us the grace to do it. It allowed our emotional relationship to build and become strong without the physical part becoming a distraction.

“…it allowed our emotional relationship to build without the physical part becoming a distraction.”

I found myself falling more and more in love with my wife every day. I truly found myself in love with who she was and not just excited about the newness of a relationship. There were times when I really wanted to kiss her, but I knew that it would be so worth the wait. I’m so thankful we did, because on our wedding day when we kissed for the first time, I felt like I won the best prize ever. My wife.

Sal, 29, California

2 Responses to “A Man With a Plan”

  1. Beautiful story! I’m curious to know more of your dating process. How was the journey towards clarity to know that you would get married? How long was the time from dating to getting married? Thanks for sharing

Leave a Reply