What does God actually believe about sex? In this conversation, our directors Cole & Cait assess the source of our belief system. Not the conscience source but the sub conscience. What do you believe? Why do you believe it? Where did that belief system come from... especially in the area of sexuality. They dive into how important it is to be intentional to have our belief systems rooted in biblical truth rather than in the world.
“Sex is not a social construct, it’s the way God has decided to reveal himself” Chris Cruz, Bethel Church’s Young Adult Pastor shares his message on the theology of sex. This message is a mix of his own personal revelation from the Lord partnered with biblical understanding about the difference between human understanding vs God’s real intentions for sex. From intimacy, to conversation, to protection, to emotions, sex is sacred and telling a story that is all put together to be worship unto Him.
When you see someone you’re attracted to, awesome, opportunity time. Ask yourself, “what am I attracted to about this person? What do I like about him/her?” Is it his confidence? Is it her kindness? Does he represent a really good caring dad to me - one that I wish I was or wish I had when I was growing up?
Join Debra Fileta who is a licensed professional counselor who is focused on relationships, and an advocate for “healthy people make healthy relationships”. In this podcast Debra, Caitlin and Sloane dive into the common myths about purity culture and break the boxes surrounding them. “It isn’t a toxic purity culture, it’s toxic shame culture. Purity is not toxic, it is the shame, the isolation, the hiding.” Sex is so sacred and is created to be beautiful within the perimeters of marriage. In Debra’s story, shame and guilt didn’t help her break free of sexual sin but the realization that sex is God’s gift and is beautiful in the right place and time. Perspective is empowering, before marriage, but also how it impacts us within a marriage. It is time for all of us to break out of the shame of our histories and step into the fullness God has for us!!!
If you want to hear more from Debra her Instagram handle is @truelovedates
Resources:
True Love Dates by Debra Fileta
Choosing Marriage by Debra Fileta
Love in every season by Debra Fileta
The Naked Truth about Sexuality by Havilah Cunnington
If you’re watching porn thinking it will teach you something about sex, you’re training for the wrong game. Porn will give you an education, but it only teaches toxic, exaggerated, and fantasized lessons that harm individuals and relationships.
Before you’re married it’s easy to see marriage as the grande finale. It’s the thing we dream of and live for. It’s the force propelling us forward into this destination we call life. And then it finally comes! Now what?
Our sex drive allows us to connect with our spouse and create a bond for life. It’s the glue that seals together. As much as we’d like to think we’re rubber and people can just bounce off of us, the reality is that when we have sexual encounters, we’re being glued together.
We realized that we couldn’t expect our children to express what made them uncomfortable or scared if we didn’t teach them to understand and express a broad range of feelings, especially the uncomfortable and difficult ones. Our hope is that as we create space throughout our days to talk about difficult feelings, our children will be able to more easily verbalize instances where someone makes them feel unsafe or touches them inappropriately.
If you’re reading this and you currently struggle with porn, masturbation, or any other sexual sin, God has a plan for you. Jesus died so that you wouldn’t have to be a slave to addiction. He took that with him to the cross so you could be free.
Let’s talk about sex…specifically sex AFTER kids. Because we all know there are two kinds. If you are one who’s libido continued to climb after kids, if you are one who desires it regularly and if you continually feel sexy…
What causes you to get triggered? How do decisions you make pre-marriage impact your marriage? The pain or the pleasure during your first experience of an event creates a mental pathway that your brain later takes you down because it's the path of least resistance. This means EVEN if the situation isn't the same your brain/body can still react as if it is. This week's podcast feature's our directors, Cole and Caitlin Zick as they dive into the science behind sexuality and the scripture, and go after helping you become consciously aware of your subconscious "why", so you can know why you do what you do, feel what you feel, and how you respond the way you do. It’s now on all streaming platforms and YouTube!
Cole and Caitlin Zick invite us into a very raw and authentic take of their stories. What would it look like if parents healthily and intentionally talked about sex where they understand God’s full design for sexuality and that He said YES, not no? They’ll talk about helpful tools for taking an inventory on the impact your childhood had on your current perspective of relationship and sexuality. In that, the depth of your vulnerability will determine the completeness of your healing and wholeness in your marriage.