The Honeymoon Night

Andre Van Mol, MD

Sex

QUESTION


I am a virgin, but one day when I am married (hopefully) I’ll have sex. I keep hearing all of my friends that are going to get married talk about having to stretch themselves so that their husbands will be able to fit. Is that something I should worry about? Is it common for it not to fit?

DOCTOR’S ANSWER

I understand your concern, but fear not. You and your husband will very likely be a fit without your having to dilate yourself. Remember, one day you’ll probably have a baby, and that little blessing will cause considerably more stretching than a husband ever will. Yet have you ever heard your friends talk about the need to stretch their vaginas for childbirth?

Sexual intercourse can be a bit painful for a woman the first few times, but it is often much less so than many women fear. Some women try taking Tylenol or Motrin before having sex the first few times just in case. Also, keep in mind your husband-to-be may well be quite fearful of hurting you the first night — he’s heard stories, too. Clear communication, starting out carefully and gently, and being patient with each other will go a long way toward successfully handling the honeymoon jitters about sex while building up trust and deepening your relationship together.

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